Sunday, 15th April, 2007

What I Did While I was Offline

house car roof stuff hair

Without my usual internetty-distractions, I was suprisingly productive. I did, of course, continue writing about stuff — mostly grumblings about how I was disconnected — and I got a chunk of Uni-work out of the way, but I also made a significant start into getting the house ready for selling. Here, through the power of Flickr, is a few of the things that Got Sorted™ over the past twelve days...

This is my bedroom. If you've ever seen my bedroom, you'll have noticed the very obvious cracks that spidered their way up the wall and across the ceiling.

There are two reasons for them — firstly, I clumped around in the loft a while back, rearranging all the old Macs that I squirrel away up there, and in the process managed to create great big movements in the ceiling which manefested themselves as gaping voids in the hundred year old plaster.

Secondly, the pillar that seperates mine and my neighbours' doors shifted a bit when the council were doing some work in the road outside, and two ginormous chasms appeared in the walls — one in my house, and one in theirs.

But, as you can see from the photo above, with judicious use of Polyfilla, I've managed to fill them all in, and you can't tell that the house is falling down

A few weeks ago, I was woken in the middle of the night by the sound of rain streaming down the front of the house. It struck me as odd, because it's not been that long since we replaced all the old wooden guttering and fixed that nasty little problem.

When I went outside in the morning, I was rather horrified to se my downpipe flailing around in the wind, completely detatched from both the gutter, and the house itself.

I thought it was the wind that had done it, but with a bit of hindsight, it was probably some kids climbing up it — one of the other pipes on our terrace has gone the same way.

I bodged a quick fix with some cable-ties there and then, but having access to a ladder on Monday, it seemed a good idea to fix it properly.

My bin has been annoying me for months. Someone nicked the lid from it years ago, and it's been gradually collecting rainwater ever since. Were I of the 'environmentalist' type, I'd have taken the opportunity to use it to water all my plants — but I'm not. Instead, I just let it sit there, getting all dank and yukky, unable to empty it because (a) I'm a bit of a wimp and couldn't lift it, and (b) I'm rubbish at Getting Things Done™.

So instead, I drilled a hole in the bottom, and watched with glee as the water pished itself out for a few minutes

It was like having a little water feature. Or something.

Funny, isn't it, how things look white, but you only realise how yellow they are when you slap a new coat of emulsion on them?

I know this photo looks like it's still yellow — but that's just the white balance going screwy on me. In reality, the bathroom is now a rather dazzling white, and I've even cleaned all the beard trimmings out of the plug-hole.

Downstairs, in the living room, things went a little wrong. All over the place I had strange bubbling paint, because I used a really crap lot when I first painted the house.

But, my God it's looking good down there now. Even the corner with the peace lillies in it — the bit that's my little Cat Shrine with a picture of Cabbage and George's Urn Box — is looking all sparkly and clean.

All I've got to do is the kitchen and the studio...

Having forked out so much to get the car through its MOT and tax it, it seemed a little daft to leave her covered in muck. So a couple of days ago, I got out my shampoo and polish, and gave her a seriously needed clean.

I don't, I confess, wash her enough — but I like to think that when I do get the shammy out, I do a good job Two coats of polish that car's got on her now. It's a shame it'll only take one journey across the Yorkshire Moors to Leeds for her to get filthy again.

But, I also did something I've needed to do for ages. I'd presumed that the windscreen washer-jets were part of the MOT, but apparently not, seeing as when I got her back from the garage they were still not working.

For months now, I've been driving around unable to squirt water onto my windscreen, having to make do with poking a squeezy bottle filled with water out of my window every time the traffic slowed down enough.

It worked, but it was a little unelegant to say the least

In their infinite wisdom, Fiat decided to put the pump for the jets in the most inaccesible part of the car. You have to take the wheel off first, then remove the plastic thing that goes underneath the wheel arch before you can get your mits on it.

But, after a lot of swearing and random hammer swinging (I prefer the Jeremy Clarkson approach to car maintenance), I discovered (to my delight) that the pump wasn't broken — it was just that the connectors were corroded.

So now, lovely foamy water squirts onto my windscreen, which means that I'm no longer dreading driving just after it's been raining, and the spray of other cars is no longer a major hazzard to me

I wish though, that the rear wiper motor and the electric windows had been easier to fix...

A few weeks ago, just after the big winds that we had, I was rather concerned to find a large piece of lead lying in my back yard. A bit of squinting at the roof revealed that the flashing around my chimney had been wrenched off, and that patch of damp in my studio was the rain getting in after all

I'm not inexperienced when it comes to crawling around on roofs, as you might have noticed from some photos a while back, so I borrowed a ladder and tentatively hoisted myself up the tiles using the cable for the satellite dish to haul myself up to the ridge.

I know, Health and Safety would have had kittens

And, while I was up there forcing the lead back into its slot, precariously balanced and using my foot as a hammer, we figured we might as well slap some concrete around the ridge tiles — because all the motar had come out over the years, and there was a serious possibility that whoever comes to survey this place would take one look at it and declare that it wasn't weatherproof.

Granted, I didn't manage to match the colour of the existing pointing, but I think you've got to agree that I didn't do a bad job on it

And finally, I coloured my hair again

Without background knowledge, it might look like I've deliberately put red in my hair so that I look (in some way) like Ms Naumova. But it's the other way around.

I gave Kisa red streaks so that she looked like me, because at the time I'd just had mine done. Mine faded, but hers stayed, and I figured it was time to get mine 'replenished'.

They're not quite as good as they were before. Usually the hairdresser uses my old faded blonde streaks as a guide to where to put the red, but it's been so long since I last had them done that she couldn't quite see where to put the new ones.

As a result, they're more of red splodges than red streaks.

But hey, they're still rather good

At some point, I'll get around to taking a photograph — I tried a few days ago, but I wasn't being very photogenic that night for some reason.

...

Anyways. Yes, I've been busy. Not being able to waste entire days logwatching forced me to get off my arse and achieve Stuff.

Since getting back online yesterday though, I've done absolutely fuck all...

Marsh Point

photo panorama lancaster lune

I went out for a walk

Fag Break

photo lune lancaster log