Hello 
I'm Siobhan Curran/Kisa Naumova, and this is my weblog. I tend to write about stuff like crossdressing, Macs, code, cats, wine and Second Life, but in general it's just an ongoing conversation about all sorts of stuff. If you'd like to know a little bit more about what this all is, I recommend starting on this page which has a little bit of info on who I am, and what I'm trying to do — or you could dive into my five years worth of archives if you like.
Otherwise, feel free to close this box and explore...
That's All Very Well, But What About The Dresses?
For perhaps obvious reasons, I haven't been too active as "Siobhan" online recently. I'm afraid (much to my embarassment and shame) that I've been a bit slack in dealing with some of my Tranny Responsibilities™, concentrating much more (perhaps unproportionately) on the things I do as "Kisa" (making sure there's no boobies in the SL Pool on Flickr, rather than filtering out the cocks on Trannyflickr.
But that's perhaps, understandable, given what's happened.
I do think it's worth pointing out here (by the way, if I haven't already that is 
) that Thau and myself didn't meet on Second Life — we met on Flickr. And actually, come to think of it, the first time we really 'spoke' (so to speak) wasn't on one of my Kisa photos, it was one of my Siobhan ones.
(I keep thinking about that BTW. I remember at the time pondering how one day in the future — perhaps — we might get the chance to have a drink together, it seemed like the sort of thing that would happen a looooooong time from now. And it still freaks me out a little that she's actually here, right now 
)
But I digress. My point being that what with all the "aw, look how disgustingly cute our avatars are together" photographs I've been posting, I haven't really mentioned how things are going in Real Life™ — so to speak.
...
On the way over to Manchester Airport (a place that I'm not looking forward to the next time I go there¹, BTW), I sent a hilarious message to Twitter:
"Kisa: wonders if I should have told Thaumata I'm a guy yet"
Oh how the Twitter Kids™ laughed Some (surprisingly) actually took me seriously, whilst in Heathrow Airport — waiting for her connection — Thau was concocting an equally hilarious "Thaumata: OMG! KISA'S A GUY?!" reply.
But of course she knew — she'd been through my entire photostream, and read (almost) my entire blog.
...
See, this is a thing that I think often gets missed when people talk about the pros and cons of writing prolifically online. There's always those "watch out what future employers might read about you" warnings that get flinged around by well-meaning feature-writers — but they seem to be of the belief that the only kind of engagement (perhaps not the best word there) that goes on online, is a professional one.
What they miss, maybe, is the benefits of detailing all the little 'issues' and ephemeral trivia about your life — stuff that you'd normally expect to dish out gradually in the early 'getting-to-know-each-other' stages of a relationship.
Maybe I make too big a deal sometimes of being a transvestite. I know I have in the past — treating it as Some Big Secret™ that has to be divulged with a great deal of gravitas and nervousness.
But because we met online — both of us with a great deal of 'naked' information readily available to the other, we already knew our little 'foibles'. We were already of the things that we might worry about, if we had to sit the other down and say "Darling, there's something I want to tell you about myself".
And it's great
OK, so maybe you can't find out everything about someone just by reading their blog and looking at their pictures. No amount (for example) of blog-immersion will give you an impression of how irritating my inability to make decisions and to procrastinate can actually be.
But when it comes to the things that you always convinced yourself would be 'problems' — those things that you thought "I'm the only one", but discovered through the great and awesome power of the Internets that there were thousands of people just like yourself — well, through the same Internets, you can find someone who doesn't think those things are a problem at all.
Just like I did
(Today's blog is brought to you by a pair of Monsoon jeans, and a little pink nightie)
¹ But am looking forward to the time I go after that
Blogging and pictures — knowing what to expect. Yup, both is good. Met a girl called Lynne last night (we'd been exchanging comments on our respective blogs — imagined her as short, not slim, not fat. Only physical feature I'd seen was the hair and face) — in fact, she'd changed the colour of her hair (OK, wig) and she was tall and very slim. How wrong I was. Of course, the physical appearance wasn't important as there was no potential "relationship" on the cards, but sometimes it's fun to have your mis-conceptions put right by a real life encounter. Must get out more often.
Well, no, it doesn't always work. But then people lie and misrepresent themselves in real life, too. With the people I mentioned (and ooops, sorry, I forgot Antonia) there was substantial info to go on (lots of pictures, lots of blog posts, lots of emails or whatever).
Stephanie: But then people lie and misrepresent themselves in real life, too.
That's exactly what I was saying to my mum the other day. I was trying to explain about the whole blogging and Flickr communities thing and she was so worried and nervous about 'What if people aren't who they say they are'. Truth is, you never can tell for sure, even if you have known someone, face to face, for years. You just have to take a leap of faith when you think it is right.
"You just have to take a leap of faith when you think it is right."
Too right!
No amount (for example) of blog-immersion will give you an impression of how irritating my inability to make decisions and to procrastinate can actually be.
Actually, we get a pretty good idea of that from just reading your blog 
j/k
And don't worry, I'm quite capable of handling the cocks on trannyflickr on my own at this moment in time
that last bit came out wrong...
Life is all about those leaps of faith, and it is just as often a matter of trusting who we think WE are.
Just a quick 'Yay you!' from me.
It still seems to be, though, a received idea that people are totally different in "real life" to what they are online. I have to say, in my limited experience, — ie you, Luis, and my ex-boyfriend — I haven't found that to be the case at all. I couldn't have anticipated the exact sound of your voice or your mannerisms but otherwise you never came as a surprise. Nor did Luis or the ex-boyfriend. There is a moment about ten minutes after meeting when you realise you know quite a bit about the other person even though you only just met — but straightaway you realise that's actually good.
On things not being a problem — I wish I could be a little cooler there. I still find myself saying to new acquaintances things like, "you do know what I am, don't you?" I do give my self a good kicking afterwards for saying it, mind